Poetry/Prose

Now, Decide

photo credit: mine

photo credit: mine

Right now is a live wire.

You may think only something (maybe boring, maybe not, but limited by what you are exposed to) is happening.

When really everything is, now.

From the outside to sit still may seem pointless–but it is in doing this that we boil ourselves down to nothing and feel everything at once.

A massive speck, sitting there.

You might be in a little room with just yourself yet you know a whale is traversing the sea, a baby is being born, someone is digging through garbage, a businessman is clinking a glass over a million-dollar deal and you sit there and just know.

And on and on and on.

It’s electric, and you have so many options, how to perceive, right now.

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Poetry/Prose

Only Natural

Rural Nepal, 2012

Rural Nepal, 2012

Ask yourself

What is natural?

Walk into the forest

Of your sensibilities

Buzzing with life

Action

Reaction

Stillness

Disguises

Realities

Is it poisonous?

Or is it a mimic?

Nature

Mind blowing

Sit there

Go into your nature

Walk slow

Feel the bottom of your feet

Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss

The Earth

Holding you up

Infusing all of you

Always

Ask yourself

What is natural?

When you are walking through doors

Sitting at desks

Driving your car

Fantasizing

Talking on the phone

Imagining

Neurotic about social media

Worrying

Crying about a memory

Pining about the future

Pumped on inspiration

Choosing to be bored

Is it natural?

Is it?

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Poetry/Prose, Yoga & Spiritual

Can You Taste It, Yet?

the_moment_before__by_Pretty_As_A_PicturePeople can complain about it being the cause of all problems.

But frankly, the most annoying thing about ego is that it’s predictable.

Because it uses the moment instead of being in it, it’s really not so super creative.

It’s got a plan, it’s hungry, it wants to feed itself. Period.

If you watch it a while, you will think “why am I watching something not quite as exciting as CSPAN?”

And yet it gets really high ratings and people sacrifice a lot of time for it.

This numbing, predictable affair–with ego.

Watch it long enough and its pattern is clear; you’ll know what happens next.

You think you are doing a different dance, in a different place, at a different time, but when you dance with ego, it’s always the same, predictable gig.

Inside a closed bubble of ambition.

Some needless drama, as pattern overtakes innovation .., inspiring just a touch of insanity, assuaged by activity, producing more of the same.

So how do you get out?

You ask, and even demand to know!

If I’m such a smarty pants, what’s the solution?!

I guess I’m like anyone else, always inclined to engage in this predictable pattern, but awakening to the fact that if I stand away from it a bit, I can turn away from it.

This constant, superficial identity crisis that reinforces itself.

But what do any of us turn toward?

You ask me and I’ll say this:

The moment.

And if you ask me in five minutes, I’ll say the same thing.

Put all your senses on it.

Close your eyes, can you see it?

Close your hands, can you feel it?

Close your mouth, can you taste it, yet?

 

 

 

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Poetry/Prose

I Don’t Want Anymore

Image credit: Panoramio "a moment of perfect contentment"

Image credit: Panoramio “a moment of perfect contentment”

It’s just that …

What I always thought I wanted

Still wants me to want it

And I don’t

I just don’t anymore

 

One day

Sometime after I was born

I caught a glimpse of it

Started following it around

 

It took me to many places

Showed me stuff

What I was studying

Was something that never ends

 

But not in a poetic way

More like a dull, repeating way

Not even like waves

Because waves are interesting

 

No

Wanting is more like a factory line

Like a big hamster wheel

Based on past constructions

That strangle the future

Time’s ticking hand, stuck

 

It’s the fragmented offshoot

Of desire

A bug in a program

A cranky robot baby

 

Wanting

 

In that space

Where want was

I grip the moments

And they feel me up

 

Penetrate

So I know where I am

Not where I was

Not where I’m going

 

Where I am

Time moves

It’s a river

 

At nights, after nights

I do drive home alone

But I don’t flinch at the cars

Even the big ones

No matter what they do

Even when they nip my mirror

In this silly town

Anymore

 

Free from all this want

Free from all the weight

Of that silly, silly want

That still wants me to want it

 

You may ask:

What to do if not to want?

 

Pardon me if I offend your wants, but how about let’s just live to the max and see what happens?!

 

Because

I don’t want

I just don’t want anymore

 

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Poetry/Prose

Older Than Time (another workshop soul sketch)

spanish-restaurant-waiter-small-80469

Image credit: coloribus.com “waiter”/light editing: me

Here is another soul sketch, of a perfect stranger I chose in Barcelona during a recent creativity workshop. He was a busboy/waiter at our hotel.

I am of service, and so I am invisible.

I am of service, and so I can fly.

I am of service, and so I am private.

Few people see me beyond what I do.

Anyone is invited.

No one is expected.

Continuous presence.

Checked self importance.

A dance among the collective.

I am a monk in common disguise.

*His age so young (maybe 16), his soul so old and his energy so selfless, I dared not take a picture and degrade the honor of such a rare human! Thus, the photo is not mine but it seems my subject would age into someone like the man pictured–and bullfighting is now banned in Catalunya (yaaay!) so this is how that graceful DNA might be channeled.

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A spontaneous mostly non-verbal thought

A spontaneous mostly non-verbal thought–October 1, 2014

Art

Here’s an Idea (and I willingly am part of its audience!)

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Poetry/Prose, Yoga & Spiritual

You Know You Never Know but I Know You Do

Krishna_ArjunaSo many people like to say “you never know”

Really? Never?

Somebody must know something–I mean how the hell else did we get here?

Today I realized that there is this massive matrix

People of all different shapes, sizes, colors, inclinations, histories, karmas

When I notice myself, I realize something

I realize that I am exactly the way I am supposed to be for my soul to accomplish its purpose

My

•Height

•Weight

•Hair color

•Genetics

•Birthmark

•Achilles heals

•Suffering

•Relief

•Ego

•Obsession

•Secrets

•Family

•Accolades

•Triumphs

•Destiny

•Faults

•Desperation

•Clown-around smile

•Limits

•Whispering to the light when I am not crying out loud

Humans, we have this ability to think about ourselves

To doubt ourselves

To compare ourselves, perpetuate suffering

To fight the flow of what we were born into

Think about it

Think about yourself

This is your outfit, right here

These are your surroundings, right now

These are the thoughts you think

For the reasons you do

For the chance to drop or embrace them

Feeding on feelings, right or wrong

We were all born into a bed

We all sleep once in a while

Everyone does

Everyone dreams against their will now and then, if not more often

When we wake up, we start thinking

Inspired by doubt, we wonder: are we somehow not the way we are supposed to be to get where we are supposed to go?

Are we late for a big party where we finally accept ourselves?

Many of our actions spring from this doubt as well

But really, come on, there are so many ways to be and yet we are truly, exactly how we are supposed to be!

We didn’t invent ourselves, now did we?

What’s all this perverse behavior about?

“You never know,” you say?

Well somebody must, somebody must … and sometimes I really do, and so do you

 

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